There's something about
Girl Scout cookies (referred to hereafter as "GSC").
I can't explain it. But, that won't stop me from trying...badly. Seriously, there's something wrong with GSC:
First, they're $4 per box. For the number of cookies you get, that's just stupid. I mean, compared to the rest of the market, we're completely over paying. But we do it. And we do it every year. And we look forward to doing it. We sign up to do it.
Second, if you're female, you can't eat just one. Go freeze a box of Thin Mints and eat one. I dare you. You can't. You might lie and say you can, but you can't. Those damn things haunt you. I just talked to an unidentified female who had to leave her desk to escape the hold of the GSC.
Third, once the box is open, its gone. Yeah, yeah, there are a few of you who aren't really into junk food, so this entire rant means nothing to you. But for those of us who enjoy life, there's something odd about that box. I watched a platter of Mrs. Grace's sit politely in the company kitchen for days, people just taking one small thing at a time. Today, one box of peanut butter GSC (not even one of the better flavors) was raped in about 2 hours.
Fourth, they put crack in the cookies. I *always* have food in my office, both good and bad. But, I've never had anyone sniff around like when there are GSC. You can feel its presence, like how a crack addict knows what dark alley to go down to score. And I'm guilty of doing it too. I would never dare to ask for food from someone I barely know. But, put a box of GSC on the desk and all rules of decorum go flying out the window.
And this rant isn't fuled by eating 1/2 of a box per day since their arrival. Nooooooo. Not at all. That isn't Thin Mint plastic in the rubbish bin. Stop sniffing in there. No, I count all of my calories. I write them in a log and get chastised if I eat more than 1500-1600 in a day. I've resisted all sorts of fast food and junk food in the past three months. I've lost almost 20lbs through diet and exercise. GSC can't derail me. What's so different about these damn cookies?
Crack. That's my conclusion. They put crack in the cookies.
Damn them.
I can't explain it. But, that won't stop me from trying...badly. Seriously, there's something wrong with GSC:
First, they're $4 per box. For the number of cookies you get, that's just stupid. I mean, compared to the rest of the market, we're completely over paying. But we do it. And we do it every year. And we look forward to doing it. We sign up to do it.
Second, if you're female, you can't eat just one. Go freeze a box of Thin Mints and eat one. I dare you. You can't. You might lie and say you can, but you can't. Those damn things haunt you. I just talked to an unidentified female who had to leave her desk to escape the hold of the GSC.
Third, once the box is open, its gone. Yeah, yeah, there are a few of you who aren't really into junk food, so this entire rant means nothing to you. But for those of us who enjoy life, there's something odd about that box. I watched a platter of Mrs. Grace's sit politely in the company kitchen for days, people just taking one small thing at a time. Today, one box of peanut butter GSC (not even one of the better flavors) was raped in about 2 hours.
Fourth, they put crack in the cookies. I *always* have food in my office, both good and bad. But, I've never had anyone sniff around like when there are GSC. You can feel its presence, like how a crack addict knows what dark alley to go down to score. And I'm guilty of doing it too. I would never dare to ask for food from someone I barely know. But, put a box of GSC on the desk and all rules of decorum go flying out the window.
And this rant isn't fuled by eating 1/2 of a box per day since their arrival. Nooooooo. Not at all. That isn't Thin Mint plastic in the rubbish bin. Stop sniffing in there. No, I count all of my calories. I write them in a log and get chastised if I eat more than 1500-1600 in a day. I've resisted all sorts of fast food and junk food in the past three months. I've lost almost 20lbs through diet and exercise. GSC can't derail me. What's so different about these damn cookies?
Crack. That's my conclusion. They put crack in the cookies.
Damn them.
posted by jenna! at
1:42 PM
1 Comments:
Thin Mints don't have crack in them - they have heroin.
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