Tuesday, September 12, 2006

Flyover Syndrome - Addendum

In 9 days I set foot in 4 states (5 if you count my starting point in California). Although I *loved* my vacation and will ramble on about different details in the next week or two, one thought came to me over & over during my tour of the Upper Midwest.

"Flyover."

I can say this after driving across Minnesota, Wisconsin and Michigan.

I'm not saying the areas aren't pretty. They are. The scenery made the drive quite lovely. But, if it were at all possible to fly to our destinations (I'm sorry, what NWA was going to charge us doesn't count as possible), I would have voted to go that route. And again, I'm not saying it wasn't lovely, it really was. The company was fantastic, the Diet Coke was abundant, but, there was just, nothing. I mean, there was a plethora of gas stations and really small towns, but that was it. And the gas stations and small towns really did all look the same. And I was really watching them, hoping for something new and different, a little mom'n'pop cafe that looked yummy or maybe a cute shop. I mean, even if you live in a small town, don't you have to eat?

Sadly no. None of the cafes looked appealing and even the one we stopped at, packed with locals, was mediocre. (Of course I could be biased since, as we were finishing our food, a pack of very sophisticated girls came in, all lit up and started talking about how fabulous they are. "We're high maintenance, but we tip well." Yeah, I'll second the former and object to the latter.) There were, of course, maybe one or two towns that defy my generalization, but on the whole, I'm sticking with my statement.

Some other oddities that add to my flyover statement which fall into the category of stuff I never needed to know:

Motels: We drove across Michigan, and did a fair amount of driving along the coast. Ok, there are about a thousand small mom'n'pop motels. (Dreamland being our favorite.) Ok, great, but there was no one staying at any of them.

Adult Stores: Ok, for the entire trip I was looking for a Target. I didn't see ONE TARGET. Not ONE. I was very sad. I saw Walmarts & Shopkos (and for those of you in CA, I didn't misspell Shopko) and even two Pigley Wigleys but sadly no Targets. I did however see two HUGE Adult Superstores in Wisconsin. That was rather amusing. One was next door to a Christian Supply sort of place. We weren't sure exactly what sort of supplies Christians needed, but hey, Christians need supplies too, I guess.

Restrooms: Ok California and Arizona, take notes from your Midwest counterparts. The restrooms across the midwest, freakin' fantastic. They were clean AND well-stocked. OMG. No matter how small the town was or how random the gas station was, it was ALWAYS a nice bathroom. Praise Jesus. And thank you midwest restroom cleaners, you seriously made my trip that much nicer.

1 Comments:

Blogger MplsMel said...

Hey there J, I couldn't agree with you more. I've done my fair share of road trips throughout the midwest and I think your assessment is accurate. I never did get the HUGE adult superstores in Wisconsin. I haven't seen them as much in MN, although it seems like in the small towns you can't blink in the small towns without seeing a strip club.

10:42 PM  

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